It takes two to lie, Marge. One to lie and one to listen.

Posted on March 26th, 2007

I am a terrible liar. I do not mean to say I lie compulsively, but rather that my lies have a transparency that borders on invisibility. And not the cool Predator kind that enables seven-foot-tall aliens to ambush commandos.

Complicating matters is Facebook, which documents every single fucking action you take and posts it on the homepage of every contact in your network.

Facebook Group Graham Mutch joined the group Advocates of Rhino Porn. 9:01pm

facebook Friend Jamie Lirette and Lori are now friends. 9:07pm

Facebook Group Graham Mutch has left the group Aryan supermen for a new Third Reich. 9:22pm

I'm sorry, I don't mean to be anti-social on a social networking site, but I can't be the only person who doesn't want all his friends and co-workers to know he's a member of the Manimal Fan Club (Simon MacCorkindale, where have you gone?).

The only thing worse is that our co-workers keep trying to document our career history when we've made it perfectly clear why that's a very, very bad idea. It's almost enough to make me run back to MySpace, where the tricked out pages have all the aesthetic allure of digital vomit.

-Graham

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Rather than cancel yet another debate, we're going to post it on Tuesday this week. Better late than never, right?


UPDATE: Turns Out I Lie Pretty Well After All

It's 11:42, Monday evening. Jamie's exhausted from hockey and I've just returned from four hours in the emergency room with a four-year-old so feverish she's uncomfortable to hold. So I'm afraid we'll be skipping the debate again this week. I can honestly say that this will be the last time, however...

In the meantime, if you enjoyed our deconstruction of Dora, you'll love this:

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