July
17th, 2006
Oh my God,
the agony. I'm not even referring to the public humiliation
that inevitably concludes my laughable attempts at seduction.
No, I'm talking about that fact that this comic was, for obvious
reasons, created before Jamie went on vacation... rendering
us powerless to satirize recent stories that will be old news
by the time he returns next week.
I'm
talking about Pete "Please Drink Responsibly" Coors
getting busted on a DUI.
CP&B
creating a feature
film for Burger King. Above all else, I'm talking about
Randy Jackson's ill-advised
decision to become the face of Oreos.
Damn you,
Jamie. Damn you to hell.
-Graham
P.S. to
Marc in Toronto: At the risk of unintentionally alienating innocent
Marcs... you're a fucking idiot. Most people would gladly crawl
through broken glass for a shot at what you threw away. Moron.
P.P.S. Words
vs. Pictures will return - with Jamie - on July 24.
Sympathy
for Monsieur Vengeance
Last week,
I called Zidane's head-butt
weak sauce and I stand by that, but his claim
that he lost it because Materazzi ripped into his mother and
sister gives me pause. If Jamie were here, he'd be the first
to tell you that I respond... poorly... to perceived attacks
against my family. I don't have enough that I can afford to
take them for granted so, yeah, I'm a little crazy about it.
That's still no excuse for what Zidane did...
but, if it's true, I'd consider it sufficient explanation.
