As any gambling addict will tell you, watching sports is a lot more fun when you've got a stake in the outcome. I spent yesterday cheering for France, not because I wanted them to win, but because I find our alternate comic much funnier. Combined, the two form a Romance language phrasebook suitable for terrifying waiters in the world's finest restaurants.
Traitorous bastard that I am, I switched sides near the end and started cheering for Italy. Their goalie was awesome whereas the only thing the French guy had going was an uncanny resemblance to Moby. And unless it turns out Materazzi was threatening Zidane's children, that love tap was weak sauce.
Special thanks to our friend Mario for the Italian translation. I handled the French myself, so I apologize in advance if the grammar's atrocious. I never would have passed Grade 6 French if my father hadn't been having an affair with the teacher. Thanks, Dad!
P.S. It's a miracle that you're reading this at all. Jamie's on vacation and this is the first time I've done the techie stuff myself. See those weird white lines just below the comic? Me too. And I have no idea how to fix them. I'm just grateful I didn't crash the site entirely.
P.P.S. Words vs. Pictures will return - with Jamie - on July 24.
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