I will give you $10 if you can follow Jamie’s narrative

Posted on January 9th, 2006

Graham is always recommending movies to me. And most of the time they're good. There's also many times where our taste in movies diverge... drastically. I sat through 25 excruciating minutes of Citizen Kane. What a shitfest! Hated it. Graham berated me for that. You see, Graham's a big movie snob. He just can't enjoy something for what it is. A crap movie can still be a good crap movie.

Take “The Island” for instance. Graham and I saw it together. Sure there were plot holes you could drive a truck through, and more product placement than all the reality shows combined, and some questionable dialogue, and several continuity mistakes – but, Scarlett Johansson is really hot, so I cut it some slack. It was a fun premise and I enjoyed it for what it was; a good bad movie.

We seem to talk a lot about movies in this industry. Almost every Monday it's: “I went to see the new Penguin lust documentary on Saturday. Have you seen it? No? Oh my GOD YOU HAVE TO SEE IT! It's brilliant!” I don't watch boring movies about the mating habits of penguins, or poignant dramas about... well anything. And don't give me attitude about my preference in movies either. (Yes, I know the term hypocrite, thank-you). Also, I hate fancy cake. What ever happened to the plain old grocery store cake? And restaurants! Why the fuck would I want to go spend $200 on a meal just because of it's status. Screw that. Give me a Goddamn burger and fries. Mmmmm. Now I'm getting hungry.

Don't let me write blogs anymore, Graham.

- Jamie


This is what I get for not having the blog finished by 10 a.m. the day before. Way to stay on topic, man. “I hate movies that make me think… oooh, cake!” And shame on you for referencing Johansson without providing a link to her in something low-cut.

He's right, though; burgers and simple cakes are best. But our tastes in movies don't so much diverge as have restraining orders against each other. Which is not to say I don't value his opinion. On the contrary, if Jamie raves about a film, I've just saved fifteen bucks and two hours of my life.

As to the comic, it does strike me as odd that rape, the most horrific violation one human can inflict on another, should turn out to be such a hallmark of quality cinematic entertainment. It also occurs to me that we can probably scratch Catherine MacKinnon off the mailing list.

More rape-themed movies I've enjoyed:



To Kill a Mockingbird

The Constant Gardener

(Not Deliverance. I don't think anyone actually enjoys watching Deliverance. Certainly not Ned Beatty, who has to know that when he dies the In Memoriam scene they'll play at the Oscars will be of him squealing like a pig.)


P.S. The idea for this week's strip came out of a conversation with Gerrit, our friend and fellow cinephile. He's such a nice guy that you could borrow his Oldboy DVD and not give it back for four months and he wouldn't hold a grudge. I hope.

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