Title:               A Few Months Ago, At Mountain Dew HQ
Sub/RSS:      Baaaaaaad goat

PANEL 1
Visual:            At the Mountain Dew Head Office, two white guys in suits are talking.

Dew guy 1:    Hey Kevin, how’s the Lil Wayne sponsorship working out?

Dew guy 2:    Couldn’t be better! Short of him mocking the torture murder of a civil rights icon, I don’t see how this partnership can possibly go wrong.

PANEL 2
Visual:            At the Mountain Dew Head Office, two white guys in suits are talking.

Dew guy 1:    Glad to hear it! Because we’re thinking of chasing even more street cred by handing our brand over to Tyler the Creator.

Dew guy 2:    Not sure I know his work.

PANEL 3
Visual:            Guy 1 is singing (maybe little musical notes to indicate this?)

Dew guy 1:    “Victim, victim, honey you’re my fifth one… rape a pregnant bitch and tell my friends I had a threesome.”

Dew guy 2:    That is clearly someone we should give total creative freedom. Just be sure you ask him to make the brand a synonym for substance abuse and violence against women. “Charged with a DewUI” or “I’m gonna Dew you go up.” Surprise me.